Thursday, October 5, 2017

Personal problems of senior citizens and some suggested solution

Personal problems  of senior  citizens and some suggested solution

Rewritten by
P.R.Ramachander



(To celebrate senior citizens day , Usha Ramakrishnan of Global  adjustment foundation interviewed  some senior citizens living in   Ananya shelters , Coimbatore  and also sounselled them. Excerpts were  published  as a booklet called “Anubavathin Pathayile(In the path of experience) “  in Tamil was brought out by the Tamil Magazine “Mangayar Malar” in their laest  issue. I thought that this would be useful to all  senior citizens  and have rewritten it in English.My deep sense of Grattitude to Smt.Usha  Ramakrishnan, Members of Ananya  shelters, Coimbatore as well as mangayar malar)

1,Nani asks,”For a very long time we have toiled hard for sake of family welfare,
Our children have developed wings and flown away, Can he not  spend some time with me?
Can he  not tell some consoling words ? AS  he is engaged only in politics, newspaper and  Television,
I am getting bored and it is but  natural  that  I get angry with him  and some times shout at him.”
We tell Nana, “Hey Nana,  can you not  jointly go for walks , see the   television serial together?
If you cannot , can you not   talk to her  , about your life in flash back, Laugh or cry together,
And we feel that the love of young age is torrential  and love at your age  is calm, serene and pleasant.”

2.Nana and Nani told  “Though we have several  minor  problems of health  and  tiresomeness always,
We rarely talk about  them   to our children in USA , but when talking   with my son the skype ,
And when he asked , “Why do you  look so weak and so   dull, Without holding our toungue,
WE blurted out about our  major and minor problems , making him sad  and we feel bad.”
WE tell them, “By telling your  stomach upset  , he is not  going to send gelusil  tablets from there,
And all that  you have to do is to look after yourselves  to the best  of your ability  and tell him,
Oh son, By grace of God   except for  minor problems we  are okay, and keep him happy.”

3.Nana  and Nani told, “we feel weak but our thought  keeps on galloping fast like a horse,
Worried whether Swacha Bharath  yojana  would work out , What would happen in Tamil Nadu,
How can my   son’s  in laws   talk  to me like that, ,Who will win  the Big Boss  this time, and so on and on”
We told them , “Repeat  the name of God  as many times as possible, do not see  those tear jerkers in TV,
But see some entertaining  programmes , Try  to sing even if you   do not know   how to sing,
Daily spend time in meditation and drive away   worrisome  thoughts   from your mind.

4.Nana and Nani told, “The  most unfortunate  thing  about old age  is forgetfulness,
We do not know where  we kept the key, We do not remember about what day it  is today,
WE do not remember  , what we ate  yesterday and feel scared  that it will increase  with advancing age.”
And we told them, ‘you  can jot down important matters on a white  board  in your home,
When important matters are being told , you can concentrate  more on them,
You can play games like cross word and Sudoku so that our brain also get exercise,
And most important of all, try not to get worried   about how it will progress with age.”

5.Nana  and Nani told, “ we  both grew up in a joint family   where  life was,
Full of joy, care  , love teasing  and day in and day out of  cracking of jokes,
But for the past few years ,  we  have become all alone and solitude hurts us.”
And we told them, “Happenings in life  which were  beyond us are done by God,
But then how to face the   life now onwards  is very much with us  ,
If only you  take  things in a  positive manner , you may even enjoy loneliness.”

6.Nana as  well as Nani told , Our son presented us with latest model  of cell phone,
As well  a tab, and we are not able to understand   anything  about them,
IN fact  out LKG grandson   is really a Ph D  in their operation, but still we hesitate”
WE told them, “we congratulate  you on your  past great life  which was  a constant fight for survival,
WE understand how  wise you are  , but please understand that  every one need not know everything,
Try  to approach a well meaning friend and even your grand son   to learn about it,
For your  using them slightly will make    your children happy and they do not expect  you to become a master”

7.Nana and Nani told, “ They put hearing aid and made us hear  better, they put glases,
And made us see better, when the knee joints were paining they replaced it,
If we have high or low blood pressure, high sugar etc we were asked to swallow tablets,
Is there any such cure for  mental worry   and consequent  restlessness?”
We replied, “For any thing which can be seen by the eye  or felt by some means,
There can be a cure but for   curing mental worry , the medicine is within you,
Pat the mind and say to it, Darling, from now  on have  only positive never negative thoughts.”

8,Nana and Nani said  “ Our daughter  is begging us to come again and again to  USA,
We  along with her parents  have been visiting her  every time  when she becomes in the family way,
After  spending lots of time  marketing for pickles , under garments  and so on.
We  have retired   from our job but will  we be  able to retire  from these back breaking  duties”
We told them,”Life without our usual friends and  surroundings would be  indeed boring,
It is for you to tell them , sorry and they  would understand and make other arrangements.”

9.Nana and Nani say, “we understand that  our government is bringing out,
Several plans to help its   senior citizens right from travel to  saving money,
But how do we know about them because asking half baked people have only added to our  confusion”,
We told “true, you can search the internet but if you are not familiar, you  can read,
Government announcements or even approach the   agencies  or officers directly.”

10.Nana and Nani told , “ we are scared  to live in apartments in metros  , though they say  that,
There is only one common wall , most of them living there run from morning to night,
And we are also scared  when we read that people like us living alone are  attacked by criminals.”
We said, “what you are  saying is true  for there is solitude and scare  in old age,
But why don’t you choose  living in a community of people like  well planned senior citizen homes.”

11.Nana  told  “grand children never speak to me for they are  busy in their own way,
It is difficult to see  our  son in the home and daughter in law  is very busy all  the time,
And Nani spends all  her time in front of idiot box, how  do I talk with another human being”,
We told , “dear sir, large number of NGOs  need people like you to help them, you can go to hospitals,
Or old age homes and read books for those who cannot get up, you can tell them  about God.
If what you talk gives pleasure to others , you can do counselling and  you would  get love by giving it .”

12.Nana and Nani said, “Have you seen a Tamil flick where  the hero is scared of everything,
Our life is very much similar, we think of death, how , when and what sort?
All the people who were  near and dear  to us  are daily  bidding us bye  and going to the  other world.”
We said, “true, after a certain age  death  comes nearer and nearer  and  spiritual  and Godly,
Pursuits  are one method of avoiding thinking about them, Should you not,
Set an example to others  and make others feel  sad that  you would one day be not there with them.”


13.Nana  and Nani said, “we are above seventy, we desire to go to new temples, want  to,
Go to yoga classes , meet near and dear relatives but our capacity for walking has gone down,
Even for routine tasks since we cannot  walk or go by bus, we are forced to pester our busy kids.”
WE said, “things have changed a lot as dependable mode of transport  like auto and taxis are in your finger tips,
And you can also ask your children when  they go  out and plan a trip in his route  , Gods had only one vehicle,
But we   are  having so many choices  which  rush to do your needs.What about sharing with your friends?”




1 comment:

Unknown said...

Dear and respectful Nana and Naanis

Reading your all personal problems and what written by Mr.Ramachnderji, it is simply to say no consolation to you all by any body. Because today we are the reasons for ourselves to stay in Nana Nani homes.
- Emotions which is biggest evil which spoiled us which we could not able to cut down time to time. Today lot of talks by you all about to sing about GOD, Chant the GOD's name and Yoga, excercise bla...blaa. Beyond the materialistic emotions, have you put and practice faithful emotions with your GOD? before reaching Nana Naani Homes.
- Nani is crying that why my son is not talking with me. Not spending time with me. Come - on what your son shows you against the emotions showered on him. If you would have done the same with GOD, today you will not think about your son. Today I am 50 years. GOD willing I may have another 10 years of professional life. For the last 10 years, I have started practicing the detachment theory. Switched my thinking towards GOD. Started to cutting down the emotions and living with my family to provide their needs happily. Now I never feel that tomorrow my son will take care or my daughter will take care. Because, I am bowed to GOD's feet that he will take care. All like minded people are emerging with my group and started realizing the fact. We don't want to have Nana Naani to be shelter for your personal needs. It should be the place to detach yourself and live your life happily. Show your kids, we are happier than you and teach them tomorrow they should not be part of any crying Nana Naani Home. Don't Cry. You don't need to cry about your biological relations. Only think about your spiritual light. Jai Shri Ram and Radhe Krishna